Sunday, January 25, 2009

Bittersweet papers

We've already sort of announced (to family and on Facebook) that we're starting the adoption process to adopt Critter #2 from Thailand. We've even started mentioning it in sidebar information on this blog. But I haven't brought myself to blog about it yet.

I'm excited that our paperwork is nearly completed (this week we hope to send our dossier for state certification and then authentication at the Thai Embassy). If all goes well, our dossier could even be on it's way to Thailand by the time T's adoption is finalized. I'm excited by the chance to add a critter to our family. I would love to have another child to snuggle and read to and dance with and teach things to. I can also see T's enthusiasm in all he does increase when there are more people around. I get the feeling he is a BIG FAMILY kind of kid. I would love him to have a sibling to tear around the house with. An added bonus - if Grandma's baking remains constant, the number of cookies they each receive would be cut in half from current levels! =)

But a big part of me feels sad about the stack of official papers on my dining room table. The current wait to receive a referral from our agency is really long. Really, really long. I'm fine with the wait. I am lucky this time around to have T to keep me busy. What makes me sad is the thought that, with the wait so long, it is extremely likely (almost certain) that our child has not yet been conceived. I feel like some kind of reverse time traveler who knows that an event will bring someone pain but am powerless to stop it. (And if I could stop it, I would cause my future child never to exist or at least to never know me, which makes me feel not only sad but also guilty for feeling sad.)

If only I knew who this birthmother was going to be. If I could somehow provide her with some kind of assistance, something, perhaps she could avoid an unplanned pregnancy or make arrangements to be able to parent her child. Obviously I can't see the future, and I can't change the circumstances of the (unfortunately) many women in the world who will decide they are unable to parent to their children. But nonetheless I feel a little sad getting in line for a child that doesn't yet exist.

I look at the picture of T's birthmom every day. I often wish I could share the funny things T says and does with her. That she could see how fast he's growing into a little boy she can be very proud of. That she knows how lucky we feel that he's part of our family. I love T with all my heart, and I cannot imagine my life without him as much as I cannot imagine her life without him.


Mr. T the flirt

We met friends for dinner at our local Thai restaurant tonight. We were happy to see our favorite waitress who we haven't seen in about 10 months.

At our referral-celebration dinner, she taught us how to pronounce T's name correctly. At that time, she was so excited to hear about his adoption and asked a lot of questions. She said a lot of families bring in kids adopted from Asia, but never from Thailand. On subsequent visits, she always recognized us and asked if we had heard when we'd be traveling to Thailand to meet him. Once we were back home with T, we didn't see her again until tonight.

She recognized us even though it's been many (MANY!) months and was just gushing over T the entire time. She wanted to touch him and hold him. He wanted NOTHING to do with this initially. He wouldn't even look at her and was shooting me "Help me, Mama!" looks while trying to climb out of his booster chair into my lap. She spoke in Thai to him and was trying to teach him simple words (including, sadly, the word for water, which he once knew but has already been replaced with English). She brought out some baby spring rolls for him to eat.

By the end of the meal, however, he was flashing her his grin across the room. She asked again to hold him and he raised his arms to her. Before we could blink, she was on her way into the kitchen with him to introduce him to the cook! We thought we'd hear screaming or see his little head turning frantically to see us. Oh no. He adored the attention. After making his way back to us, he asked to go to the kitchen again. This time she coaxed him to walk next to her. By the time we left, he was giving her hugs and kisses. Sigh. We are going to have our hands SO FULL when he's a teenager! On the very positive side, we may have made a friend (and found a babysitter!).


Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Court date

In less than a month, we will be finalizing T's adoption. The court date is exciting news we've been waiting to get for a few days. At this point, it's hard to even consider the fact that he's, legally, not yet part of our family. We can't wait.
At home, T has expanded his talking to singing. It's especially cute when he sings about the people's whose name he knows. After enjoying a couple of songs, I've now seen the light and have a recorder at the ready for his next debut.

Robin and I are getting the bug for learning some Thai. I know what you're thinking..."why're home!" Well, with all the English T is learning, we're thinking it would be nice for him to also know some Thai. It's been fun to talk to him about Thailand...although I'm sure he's only beginning to understand what we're talking about.

The cold and snow this winter has us all getting a case of cabin fever...although T and I get outside sometimes. Last weekend I figured out how I can get back into cardiovascular exercise without inventing a way to keep T happy while I'm on my bike....pull him around the yard in his sled. It's a GREAT workout for me, and he loves the ride. I should have thought of that sooner.

Lest there be any doubt that my boy is growing, compare this picture from June and another from last week.

Time flies when you're having fun.


Friday, January 9, 2009

Holiday wrap up

Holiday seasons are always busy, so I'll skip telling you how busy ours was. Naturally, it was different having T with us this year...and wonderful. Robin and I have spent many hours remembering what Christmas was like when we were kids and experiencing the other side of it as parents. It was great.

We woke Christmas morning with a tradition from Robin's family where we opened stockings first.

Robin's parents arrived for breakfast and opened presents with us.

T figured out quickly the fastest way to open presents (start on the end).

Robin and I were excited to give him one of the books we bought in Bangkok.

T got these homemade blocks from Grandad and Nana. Awesome.

Later that day, we were off to visit my mom to do Christmas with her the next morning.

One of the fun activities there was putting on a parade.

A week later, my father and stepmother came to open presents for a 3rd and final our place.

Grandpa had been waiting a long time to give this train to T. It was a hit...he's a little too young to do much with it, but under supervision, he loves playing with it.

I'd call it a success. He was sad to see the tree go. We're not sure how much of the Santa stuff he understands. He called Santa "toy", and always pointed to the ceiling when talking about him.

A gift Robin and I made for ourselves this year was a book of our blog from our journey to Thailand. There's just something about reading it in print that makes it special. We were happy with how it turned out.

Now, with all the decorations put away, we get back to normal life. We're looking forward to the new year and more opportunities to meet and spend time with friends and family.


Monday, January 5, 2009